Sansani News !
Tonight 20:15 IST a big announcement to be made where Modiji will be banning the biggest search engine ‘Google’ in India for reasons better known only to him.
You don’t believe me??? Fine, don’t. Sooner or later even this can happen. Now that we are habitual of welcoming the unexpected with forced-open-arms, then why not Google ban ?
What if the D-day is tonight and you have no time to prepare? What if Google was gone and you couldn’t google what happened to Google?
Think ! Think !
Let me take you through a series of situations that will happen in India most likely than not . Here’s anticipating a few :
You are in the middle of a conversation and the other person mentions a strange, complex word and you do not know what it means. What did you do in the past ? Opened google, typed ‘meaning of so and so’ and your work was done. But now? You scratch your head. Then secretly ask Alexa/Siri and all you get is , “Mainu ta aap ni pata yaar!”
You don’t know Punjabi? Congrats, who will translate for you now?
If you’ve let your brain at rest till date, you are doomed. Google has driven away and so has it’s drive, err…Google drive. No more data storage services on the click of a button.
Astrologers are predicting tough times ahead if you are one of them. Magar ek upaay hai – Start worshipping almonds. Khaane se kuch nahin hota.
You : “Bhaiya ye raasta kahan ko jata hai?
He : Usse pehle yeh bataiye, aap jahan se aa rahe hai kya wahan connaught place padta hai?”
Get used to above conversations because this will be an everyday affair. The degree of dependency we have today on Google Maps is immeasurable. Wearing ‘One for all and all for one’ tees seems to be the only way out in this case.
With weather forecasting also gone, say goodbye to those sunny and rainy weather screenshots you posted on social media. The struggle to carry or not carry umbrella will be even more real. However our Mausam Vibhag can finally rejoice. They will also have followers now. Yayy!
Above all, if we were left with anything it was Youtube. Vo bhi gaya leaving You.
Believe you me, that’s worse than a bullet! Lonely nights will become lonelier for many. Arey, don’t laugh. It is a serious problem 😉
Jokes apart, May Google stay with us till our last breath because here ‘Sanu ki!’ will just not work.
Meanwhile I am secretly bracing myself from Sundar Pichai’s curses. Do you have any tips?
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